Post by "The Aussie Icon" Croc on Dec 23, 2010 19:59:22 GMT -4
(The show comes back from a commercial break and cuts to Croc's in the back. Croc is speaking to what appears to be a high ranking AWA official)
(CROC)
What do you mean my roadie is not here!
(AWA OFFICIAL)
I am sorry Croc but there was troubles with the transporting company and also some of your demands were too hard to achieve.
(Croc looks gobsmacked)
(CROC)
Too hard to achieve? Do you think I said it was too hard to achieve when I spilt my blood in the centre of the ring night after night making this industry tons of money? Do you think I said it was too hard to achieve when I became the first ever BWA grand slam champion? Do you think I said it was too hard to achieve when I had to endure endless promos with that career killing Ripper?
(The official drops his head and Croc points his finger at him)
(CROC)
The answer is no... I just did it! And if I want 100 green M&Ms with my name printed on each individual one and 50 fortune cookies with inspirational messages of how awesome I am inside... Both of which are hand fed to me by 2 bikini clad models, who are under the instruction of my British butler whose real christian name is Geeves and who has served royalty on more than one occassion...
(Croc gets up the officials face)
(CROC)
Then you should just do it! Got it?
(AWA OFFICIAL)
Yes Croc
(CROC)
Now that's better. Now where in this stinking arena is my dressing room?
(AWA OFFICIAL)
The wrestlers common dressing room is down the hall and second door on the left.
(Croc looks gobsmacked)
(CROC)
Did I hear you right? Did you say wrestlers common dressing room?
(AWA OFFICIAL)
Yes. It is where all the wrestlers get changed for their matches.
(CROC)
I know what a f**king common dressing room is, but do you really expect someone of my calibre to use a dressing room with men and women who are not fit to breath the same air as me?
(Croc is still in disbelief)
(CROC)
Do I look like I am a curtain jerker? I am the god damn main event! And speaking of that, why haven't I been given the Undisputed Title yet?
(AWA OFFICIAL)
Well you haven't won the title. You haven't even had a match here.
(CROC)
That's not the point. I am the Aussie Icon. I was under the impression that I would just be given the title upon my return.
(AWA OFFICIAL)
Who told you that?
(CROC)
I did
(AWA OFFICIAL)
Well you can't make those calls Croc
(CROC)
Yes I can
(AWA OFFICIAL)
No you can't
(CROC)
Who am I?
(AWA OFFICIAL)
Er... Croc
(CROC)
Exactly... So I want you to do two things... Find me a new dressing room and tell Geeves where it is so he can attend to my lunch needs. Secondly I want you to go find that Undisputed Title, grab it and give it to Geeves so he can disinfect it and give it a good buff and polish.
(AWA OFFICIAL)
We couldn't find you a butler called Geeves, but we have a new apprentice ring crew attendant if you'd like. Robert come over here!
(CROC)
This is disgusting. I will once again do things for myself.
(Croc storms off and the camera stays on the AWA Official who looks down.)
(AWA OFFICIAL)
I don't think your services will be required by him.
(The camera pans down and shows the memorable Lil' Bob standing next to the AWA official, decked out in a suit and tie)
(LIL' BOB)
Some people just have no class.
(The camera cuts back to Croc who is storming the hallways. He stops at a door, opens it and looks in)
(CROC)
This will do.
(Croc looks at the door and sees a name on the door. Croc grabs the name and rips it off before the camera can see what name it has on it.)
(CROC)
How the hell does this guy get his own dressing room.
(Croc throws the name plate in the rubbish bin)
(CROC)
Well I now proclaim this room as mine. Any objections?
(No one says a word because no one is around)
(CROC)
Good...
(Croc pulls out a permanent marker and writes his name on the door. He walks into the room and makes his way straight to the adjoining restroom. He is in there for a few moments before rushing out)
(CROC)
What kind of animal does not flush after a number two! This is disgusting.
(Croc looks like he is going to vomit)
(CROC)
And where the f**k is Geeves?
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